Updated: Jan 17, 2019
We're often telling ourselves (and those that will listen) stories about how we were wronged, or cheated or left out. And in these stories we are always the victim. And as a victim, retelling these stories keep us stuck in that role. The victim. Doesn't feel good, does it?
One way I moved from victim to winner was to change my story. That's right, changing the story was one tiny decision that required absolutely nothing except to change my mind.
Here's the short story. My ex husband cheated on me and after many years of trying to make our marriage work, I had to call it quits. I repeated that story with all it's sorted details to anyone who would listen, and in it, I was always the victim.
It was during the telling of that story that a friend asked me if I thought it was time to let it go, to decide to tell it differently. Wow, what an eye-opener. I said, okay, I'll try that. And I did. From that moment on in that story I was the winner, and while the facts didn't change, the way I viewed it did.
It went like this, my husband cheated on me, I tried to keep it together but was unsuccessful at that. The day I called it quits was one of the best days of my life because from then on I was no longer involved with someone who would treat me like that and I was free to find a partner worthy of my love.
Do you see what happened there? In the second telling of that story I'm the survivor, I'm the lucky one. I'm the one who made the best decision for me. Whew, that feels so much better.